This Obsession of Mine
by litttleonee
Summary: I love you so much it hurts. If I lost you I couldn’t look at you ever again because you’re so beautiful it makes me cry.... (HD slash)
1. Me too

Authoress Note: TA DA!! This is ACTUALLY the SECOND Harry/Draco fic I've written, but the other one I just haven't been able to upload because either fanfiction.net was being a bitch and not working, or I decided to change something to it. *hehe* I've been writing this one all weekend, well Saturday and Sunday. And I finished it late last night. I for once am VERY extremely happy with it!! ((Jadyn, thanks for reading it and telling me what to fix and change! Love ya!)) here is the fic. so read it if u like, review if u want, and flames, as always, are welcome. yea im strange….

This is SLASH!! So if that's not your cup of tea, don't read it!!! But I know you really want to, even if you keep telling yourself slash is disgusting and horrible!!!! GIVE IN!!! YOU KNOW YOU LOVE IT!!!!!!!! READ IT READ IT. 

And now, for your slashing pleasure…..

** This Obsession of Mine**

It's taking over me, this obsession of mine. I can't eat or sleep. I can only think of him. When I close my eyes, I see him, I picture his perfect body. When I listen, I only hear his voice, which sends shivers down my spine.  I am lost in my own world of dreams. Thinking of him, thinking of touching him is intoxicating, and I can barely breathe. If only I could tell him of this obsession of mine.

Honestly, I did hate the boy. He's inky coloured, untamed hair was appalling to me. And that disgusting scar that was left from the Dark Lord my own father worships and wants me to as well. But now, oh God, now how I long to run my fingers through that gorgeous hair. How I long to betray my father and kill the evil monster that left that mark of pain on that boys beautiful body. But I did hate him once, and for a brief time I was free from this obsession of mine.

Ah but now, I couldn't feel more different about him. I want to hear him say my name. I want to whisper sweet things in his ear, and hear him laugh when I say something that only he will find amusing. I want to feel my lips pressed against his soft ones. Everyday, my passion grows and grows. Perhaps if my dark desires came true, it would be weakened, this obsession of mine.

Or maybe the obsession would become stronger, and take complete power of me. It's true though, he makes me so weak. I'd give up my body and soul, my whole being, everything, just to touch him, to feel him just once. Why can't I tell him? Why can't I go up to him, tell him how I feel and just…kiss him? Even if he would hate me forever after that, I would still have that to treasure forever, that kiss. I have to tell him now. I need to tell him of this obsession of mine. 

I approach him, slowly, cautiously. He is talking and laughing with his friends. I wanted him to be alone! I can't let them see me do this. Oh, Jesus Christ, I know he'll kill me if I say it to him. but I have to do it now. Right now...

I gently grab his arm, and pull him a few steps away from his now smirking, yet surprised friends. He looks at me with confusion, then sighs.

"What do u want, Malfoy?" his words sound harsh and annoyed and cut through me like a blade. I can feel tears start to form in my eyes. Malfoys don't cry, Draco. Can't ruin the Malfoy name by crying like a girl. Oh fuck the Malfoy name....

"I..Harry..I.." I stutter my words, and he raises his adorable eyebrows at me.

"What's with using my first name, Malfoy? And why the hell are u stuttering like a stupid arse?"

I can't get the words out, so I do the thing I've wanted to do for so long. I pull him to me and kiss him. Oh my God, it's even better then I had imagined. Better then I could have ever dreamed of! His lips are sweet and soft and taste like...cream...I hear him gasp between our lips, startled by what I did. But then the most amazing thing happens. he starts to kiss me back. But just as he parted his lips, an offer for me to let my tongue enter his delectable mouth someone takes hold of Harrys shoulder, ripping us apart with such force Harry stumbles a bit.

"What the fuck are you doing?!" It was Weasley who had pulled us apart, and now anger and hate fills his eyes. Harry looks at me, and he looks so lost. Hermione Granger looks at us in shock and disbelief. I turn to face Harry again, ignoring the extremely pissed off looking red head. I pull him close to me.

"Harry, I...I've wanted you for so long" I confess in barely a whisper, saying it only in his ear. He looks into my eyes, and he pulls me into his sweet embrace. He kisses my nose, then presses his lips to mine. And, to my great ecstasy, I hear him whisper 

"Me too..."


	2. Showing Him

Authoress Note: wow did you guys miss me? Well I miss slash!!! No one writes much of it these days. Maybe it's the lack of raging hormones or something Im not sure. Well I know this fic is super corny and short but I decided I really love writing in Dracos pov Sorry if it doesn't meet with your approvals. Hahahahahahahahahaha bye kids enjoy because I can be all poeticish and corny and it doesn't matter. Lol well I hope you like this chapter. Incredibly short I know but I really wanted to leave you at a cliffhanger. I know im evil I know. Now im hungry so Im gonna go eat some food. Oh yeah and my beta reader is being a stupid head and she doesn't like coming online much anymore so this was not beta read. You've been warned. 

This really is rated pg-13. I was too lazy to write the details of the sex. soorrrry!! :)

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Chapter Two

Harry takes my hand and spits bitterly at Weasley "Leave us alone Ron" The red head gawks at us, and I look around realizeing thats what everyone around us is doing. Before anyone can say anything, Harry says to me "Come on..." and he takes me gently by the hand and leads me to his dormitory. He sits on the bed and puts his head in his hands, frustrated and confused at whats going on. I stand there, like a stupid child waiting for a lecture from his parents.

"Draco" Ah, that sounds unbelievebly good coming from those gorgeous, perfect, delicious lips..Okay, focus..."Draco, what do you think you're-we're doing.."

"Harry, do you feel the way I feel about you?" I whisper to him,and he hesitates. It's all going so fast, my minds spinning and I think his most be too.

"oh.uh.."

"Do you love me Harry"

"I...I don't know.." He sighs. Just say it Draco..say it! Deep breath..

"Harry, I've loved you for so long and please...just don't send me these mixed up..feelings" He looks up at me. So innocent. He seems to have lost that confidenece he always has now. Now he looks so lost and unsure.

After what seems a century, he finally whispers.

"I think I do too..." 

"What, Harry, you what?" I need to hear him say it. I have to know for sure.

"I think I love you." 

~~~~~~~

Frozen. We're both frozen. He embraces me, pulling me slowly to his lips. Mmm...

"Harry" I say between our lips. He doesn't stop. I break our kiss so he listens to me. 

"What about your friends? Everyone?" Suddenly my mind wanders to my father. Fuck...

"I'm not thinking about that right now. What will happen to you?"

"I'll be dead. But I'd rather spend my last day with you then live a lifetime not being with you at all." He smiles, making me give one to him in return. We sit in an awkward silence for some time, but then I get the courage, and speak again.

"Come and sleep with me, we won't make love..we'll make us." 

He blushes a soft pink and looks at the ground smiling. He looks at me again and replies quietly,

"Okay."

~~~~~

I'll be honest, the farthest I've ever even gotton to, even with a girl, was kissing. I've gotton so lost in this crazy heat of passion that I kiss him again, harder, but still soft enough not to scare him. I help him pull his shirt over his head, in which it gets stuck, and he blushes a violent red. I brush his cheek with my finger and say "Its alright Harry...you've never done this before have you?" 

"Uh..no..." I smile at him again and we both shed our pants as he says 

"You haven't either have you?" It's my turn to blush "No.." I breathe out quietly. We've finish undressing, and now, we're sitting here on his bed, no clothes, both of us too scared to do anything. 

I can't take this awkwardness anymore so I start to kiss him, his lips, his neck, everywhere. I hear him moan softly, which makes me feel more at ease. I can see him lick his lips and then he barely whispers "Should I lie down..." I nod at him and he lies on his back and smiles at me. God that smile is fucking incredible. I take a deep breath in. Right now, I'm going to make love to Harry Potter. Could anything be better then that? Yes, there is. The fact that Harry Potter is going to make love to me.

~~~~~

Harry and I lay together, with his head resting against my chest. I listen to him breathing, hoping it will last forever but it wont. I know that time will come when reality hits us hard and everyone discovers us in this bed. This bed, that I showed Harry my love in. This bed, that I would kill to stay in forever. As long as I'm with him.

I stroke Harrys' hair, as he slowly drifts off to sleep. As my eyelids start to close, I hear the door open. I stiffen and whisper to Harry to sit up. He moves up next to me and I wrap my arms around him. 

"I knew that advanced locking charm I tried wasn't going to work.." He mumbles and I hug him closer. I'm not going to let these people break us apart. They can kill me before I let Harry go. 

We hear someone stomp over to the bed and they yank the curtains open. Harry and I both look at the horrified faces standing before us. My mouth drops open as I realise who all is standing in front of us.


	3. Lies

_Sorry its been so long.  I lost my slash disk and I finally found it under my bed! Thank god!  This chapter is full of crazy angst.  But aren't all my slash fics?  Say wha wha.  Okay whatever I'm out._

_ Enjoy._

**Chapter Three**

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My father, with those cold silver eyes stares down at me.  Harry hugs me tighter, closer to him.  I can feel him trembling next to me, but wait, that's me shaking isn't it?  McGonagle, that prat, looks like she's going to be sick.  And Weasley looks as if he's going to kill me.  I can see Granger there too, eyes popping unattractively out of her face.

In a blink of an eye everyone starts screaming and yelling at once.  My father makes a reach for me but Harry clings to me as I to him.  It's a blur as I hear McGonagle shouting about practicing 'unacceptable' and 'unnatural' behaviors.  My father grabs me and Harry and I lose our grasp on each other as he pulls me off the bed.  I cling to one of the sheets trying to cover myself as he smacks my face and swears terribly and quickly at me.  He continues to beat me but I can think of one and only one thing; if Harry's alright.

I can barely see out of the corner of my eye Hermione crying as she keeps asking Harry repeatedly why he chose this. Weasleys' face is as bright as the violent color of his hair.  As I hear my father say something about teaching me better then this, I hear Dumbledore raise his loud voice.

"SILENCE."  The room gets quiet; my father holds onto me still as if we've been frozen completely in time.  I silently thank that wise old man in my head.  I couldn't take my father shaking me and yelling for much longer.

"I allowed these boys to be alone up here for a reason, Lucius.  Please let go of your son and perhaps let him explain himself?"  He speaks with such calmness it seemed as if he were at a dinner party rather then being in a room with two naked boys who just had passionate sex and a group of angry and disgusted people.  My father lets go of me and I take my wand and quickly say a spell that put clothes onto my body.  I do the same for Harry, and we both sit on the edge of the bed.  Everyone waits for one of us to speak, but I know I can't. Why do I have to explain this to them?    What is there to explain?  My thoughts are interrupted by my fathers sharp voice.

"Draco I want you to tell us all right this moment that you have made a mistake and you did not mean for all of this.."  He looks at the tasseled sheets and bed pillows. "To happen."

"But..it's not a mistake…"Harry murmurs quietly.  He looks at me and says "Right, Draco?"  I hesitate.  Maybe if I just lie and say it was nothing this could all be over.  Maybe if I just ignore the idea of ever being with Harry again.  I can say it was all a big misunderstanding, a joke, even.  Maybe if I…

"No its….you're right, Father, we didn't mean for this to happen.  I don't know what came over me."  I say, and look at Harry quickly to see his face fall.  I try to give him a look that says I'm trying to save both of us, but I'm not sure if he understands that.  I see my father straighten up and look to the other adults in the room.  

"Good. Now get back to what you should be doing, Draco.  I do not want to hear about you being with any more…"  Fags, Father? Go ahead say it, I can take it asshole.  

            "Well then, if you and Harry would like to take the remainder of your days classes off, that's fine with me boys."  Dumbledore smiles now, that little glow twinkling in his eye.  He knows, oh God he knows I was lying.  I pray he doesn't tell my Father.

"Thank you, professor.'"  I say, and they all leave, giving us strange and confused looks as they pass the bed.  My father looks at me before closing the door.

"Coming, Draco?"  He growls.  I nod.

"I just need to set Potter straight, Father.  I'll see you soon then."  He nods and leaves.  As soon as the door is shut, I turn to Harry.  He looks extremely angry.  I start to speak.

"Harry listen I-"

"No Draco, you listen.  You're a fucking dick you know that.  Why did you do this?  Why would you lie to me like that?  That, this.."  He points to the bed and looks at me.  "Meant _nothing_ to you? You're a real bitch you know that Malfoy."  His words cut through me like a blade and make me shiver.

"Harry please. I love you…I love you.." I start to shake and he grabs my arm.

"Please say it was pretend.  You were just…denying it…for you dad?  And everyone?  Right Draco, right?"  He whispers, looking into my eyes.  Those green eyes look so sad now.  I miss that sparkle..

"Oh God yes Harry.  I love you so much it hurts.  If I lost you I couldn't look at you ever again because you're so beautiful it makes me cry.  You're like my air I can't live without you I know I can't.  I love you more then anything Harry."  My body begins to tremble more and I can feel hot tears starting to fall down my face.  Harry envelopes me into his arms and our bodies become one again.  He strokes my hair and cheeks and tells me its okay; he understands why I couldn't tell anyone.  This is what I've been waiting for all my life.  This is what I needed.  This is my Heaven.  And Harry is the most magnificent angel there is.

_Whew I was so close to making Harry staying mad at him for a long time  but then I would've mad myself cry.  Thanks for reading everybody! :D_

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